UltimateBeerQuest

I’ve learnt that theres nothing wrong with masturbating to a bit of porn in front of the computer once and a while and in fact I am very adament that it is a very healthy thing to do to relieve stress as long as you aren’t at it 24/7!

That being said I am not really that keen on being caught in the act by family, friends, neighbours, workmates etc… which unfortunately has happened to me over the years.

To help my fellow male masturbaters I am sharing some knowledge I have learnt from experience so that you hopefully will not end up in some of the same embarrasing situations I have.

7) Close all the curtains/blinds etc…(this main seem obvious but in the heat of the moment it can be forgotten, well I forgot anyway)

6) Have a cloth, towel, paper towel, sock, magazine, newspaper handy to wipe up your cum, nothing worse than trying to make a run to the toilet with a handful of jism only to run into your mum.

5) If you are masturbating during the day make definitely sure no one is home or will be home for at least an hour, its amazing how preoccupied you can get and not realise someone has just walked in the door.

4) If you don’t have them already invest in some headphones to avoid the sound of people humping inadvertently being broadcast throughout the house,  but don’t have the volume on the headphones so high that you cant hear anyone coming your way.

3) Develop quickening light reflexes so you can close and minimise windows in a split second, nothing worse than being too slow and your sister getting a glimpse of a big cock on your screen.

2) If you are masturbating at night try to wait till everyone has gone to bed and turn off all the lights, at least if someone does get up you can probably get away with sitting at the computer with no pants on in the dark, well its worked for me, I think.

1) Put any lube away as soon as possible, as if someone arrives unexpectedly it can be quite difficult ot explain why a tube of KY is sitting next to the computer.

This entry was posted on Friday, September 21st, 2007 at 23:24:38 and is filed under Fabio's Posts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.